Actual Customer Interactions: Legitimately Everything

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A sorority girl walks into a bar, waves to get my attention….

ME: Hi.

SORORITY GIRL: Hi.

ME: Can I grab you a drink?

SG: No, I just want a drink, but I don’t know what I want.

ME: Okay. Want to let me know when you’re ready?

SG: What’s good here?

ME: Depends what you like.

SG: I like everything.

ME: That’s going to make it more difficult to narrow it down. I’ll check back in a second.

SG: Can I be really annoying?

ME: No.

(Pause.)

SG: What?

ME: No.

SG: Oh. (Pause.) Really?

ME: I’m teasing you. What would you like?

SG: Oh! Haha. It’s just no one’s ever answered ‘no’ to that question before! You’re adorable.

ME: Thanks.

SG: Oh, I can’t decide. Just make me something good, I don’t care what it is.

ME: Anything I should stay away from?

SG: Nope. I legitimately like everything.

ME: You ‘legitimately’ like everything. Okay. (Makes fruity concoction involving vodka, amaretto, juice, etc.) Here you go.

SG: Looks pretty. What’s in it?

ME: Vodka, amaretto, orange juice–

SG: Amaretto?

ME: Yup. Are you okay with amaretto?

SG: Not really, but it’ll be fine. How much?

ME: Six dollars.

SG: (Struggles with her oversized purse and wallet, leaves six $1 bills on the bar.) Here.

ME: Thanks.

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