Collaborative Booze Review: BuzzBallz


George approached me excitedly. “I have something we need to try. It’s going to be awful.”

“Dear god,” I replied. “Whaddya got?”

“It’s called a BuzzBall,” he said. “Look at this.” He pulled out a small green sphere capped with a pop top. It looked cute but repulsive, like a diseased puppy.

“Well, damn,” said. “Here we go.”

THE DRINK: BuzzBallz Tequila ‘Rita.

THE PLACE: An undisclosed location.

ME: Why’d you end up with this one?

GEORGE: My guy at the liquor store warned me off of the “Strawberry Rum Job” and the “Lotta Colada.” This is probably the least bad one.

ME: Kind of a nifty design, I’ll give ’em that.

[The top is popped, and the beverage is poured over ice.]

GEORGE: Oh god. We’re gonna die. It smells just like really bad margarita mix.

ME: It… it tastes like if you mixed Sun Drop with cheap tequila

GEORGE: I expected it to be worse, but… You know when you get those margaritas out of the slushy machine? And then you leave it out in the sun and it melts? It tastes like that.

ME: JR! You’ve got a discriminating palate. Come try this.

JR: Reminds me of Little Hugs. [sips] Not as bad as I would’ve thought.

ME: It smells a lot worse than it tastes.

JR: Funny thing… I kinda want another sip of that. [sips] Well, it’s not getting any better.

GEORGE: What’s in this… tequila and vodka and chemical colors. That’s probably not good.

ME: It’s not as bad as I expected.

GEORGE: But not good.

ME: By no means.

JR: I’ll just throw the rest out.

ME: So overall, not as bad as you’d think. Still not good.

GEORGE: That about sums it up.