Instant Beer Review: Colectivo Keg Co. One Tun Pale Ale

WHAT A DAY, EH? It is truly remarkable outside, indeed.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING WITH YOURSELF? Well, I’m sitting on the patio of Colectivo Coffee, sightseeing and listening to the gal over yonder sing sea shanty versions of modern songs whilst accompanying herself on the accordion.

HEAVY. A bit. But she’s really good. She’s currently crushing an Arcade Fire tune.

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BUT ARE YOU DRINKING? Indeed. Today I have in front of me a One Tun Pale Ale from Colectivo Keg Co.

THEY BREW BEER??! They do!

SINCE WHEN? Since Colectivo changed their identity from Alterra Coffee Roasters in 2013. One Tun was created in collaboration with One Barrel Brewing Co., and is currently being brewed by 3 Sheeps in Sheboygan.

WELL! BUT: DID THEY MISSPELL ‘TUN?’ No. A tun is either (a) a large beer or wine cask, (b) an imperial measure of capacity, equal to 4 hogsheads, or (c) a large marine mollusk that has a rounded barrellike shell with broad spirals.

OKAY… A hogshead refers to a cask of liquid. Not actual heads of hogs.

DO YOU HAVE ANY CITATIONS FOR THIS INFORMATION? I’m too lazy to link to all of the shit I just looked up. Trust me. And if you don’t, Google it.

BUT HOW IS THE BEER? Really nice. One Tun is a crispy, mellow pale ale that pinches with a playful hop bite, without bonking you heavily on the head. George Bregar, Colectivo’s green coffee buyer, calls it “slightly bitter but incredibly clean, with a soft finish and spicy, crackery, lightly citric notes and substantial, bready mouthfeel.”

ABV? 5.8%. This one’s still in session brew territory.

PRICE TAG? $5.00, yo.

WHERE’S IT AVAILABLE? Only at Colectivo’s Wauwatosa and Madison locations.

DEEP THOUGHTS? The four gentlemen in ties to my right discussing ‘business’ are making me want to throw myself off of something very tall.

OTHER DEEP THOUGHTS? Seriously, between the four of them, they’ve used the phrase ‘reach(ed) out’ like four million times.

DO YOU HAVE DEEP THOUGHTS ABOUT ANYTHING BESIDES THE GUYS NEXT TO YOU? About the beer?

YES! Drink it. It’s good. Tame and approachable, yet boasting some body and complexity. One Tun is nothing particularly ground-breaking, but it is a thoroughly solid APA, perfect for warm weather consumption on a splendid cafĂ© patio, on a beautiful day, next to a bunch of businessy dudes on a cute networking blind date.

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