Diet Coke Jim walks into a bar for the first and only time today….
DCJ: Can I tell you something?
ME: Sure, buddy.
DCJ: Thursdays are my favorite day of the week. Want to know why?
ME: Because you get to see me?
ME: Why are Thursdays your favorite day of the week?
DCJ: Because HBO has the best porn on Thursday nights.
ME: HBO has porn?
ME: No kidding.
DCJ: And you wanna know what?
DCJ: Tonight there are two movies on back to back.
ME: Jackpot, huh?
DCJ: Yeah. None of that Taxicab Confessions crap. There’s no nudity!
ME: Well, that’s just a waste.
DCJ: It’s all talk, and no show.
ME: Total bummer.
DCJ: How many pops have I had today?
ME: Probably close to a billion.
ME: You’re right. But you’re easily closing in on a dozen.